To Have And To Hold
by amightypenguin
Summary: When a new law created by the Wizengamot threatens not only Hermione’s research on lycanthropy, but can possibly set back Remus' health, Hermione makes an offer that can save both her research and Remus, but will also change their lives forever.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: Hey everyone! So this is the reason why I hadn't updated Shared Destinies in so long! I was a pinch hitter in a RLHG fest so I had to put everything aside and bust this out. The funny thing is that the prompt was a marriage law fic. People are going to start think that's all I do! But I think this is something different. Let me know what you think! And now, back to working on Shared Destinies!

* * *

Hermione reminded herself frequently that it was a miracle that the wolf in front of her could even sit still. That alone was reason enough to be proud of herself, but it _wasn't_ enough. Not for her.

She sighed and shifted her weight to her other foot. The wolf followed her movement from the other side of the silver bars and gave her a rueful look.

"Yes, I know I could be doing something else right now," she said sulkily. "No need to give me that look."

The wolf rolled his eyes and lowered his belly to the ground, getting comfortable before closing his eyes.

"Oh sure, take a bloody nap," Hermione snapped. The wolf opened his eyes, but didn't move otherwise. "That's just great."

The wolf, of course, did not reply.

"Standing there and staring at him isn't going to make the moon set any sooner."

Hermione turned to her lab partner with a guilty look. Severus Snape hadn't changed one bit in the seven years since she'd graduated from Hogwarts, still tall, gaunt and greasy looking. After he resigned as a teacher, he began working as an Unspeakable at the Ministry of Magic with her. His sense of fashion never wavered from his starchy black robes and now in the bright light of the lab, he looked completely out of place. His skin and well, general _appearance_, seemed to demand dank dungeons and shadows.

"Well there's not much else to do," Hermione replied. "I've done all I can for him tonight."

"Now take it a step further and do as the man asked and _not stare at him_."

True. He had asked her repeatedly to not watch him when he was in wolf form during the full moon, but she couldn't seem to help herself. With every new batch of potions that she and Snape came up with, she wanted to see if there was a change from month to month. She watched and took note of everything. From his general mood to whether his size was affected. It was science, she told herself. She needed the data, whether it made him uncomfortable or not.

A high-pitched ringing sound pierced the general calm of the laboratory. Snape waved his wand at the alarm at the back of the lab and joined her next to the cage that had been attached to the lab specifically for their experimentations. Three sides were solid stone, while the part facing the lab was made of silver bars to keep the werewolf inside from escaping in the event that one of their experiments went awry. They were fortunate in that only once had they needed the protection the cage afforded them. Since then, they tested their potions even more meticulously so that they were sure that it would not adversely affect their test subject, Remus Lupin.

"Sixty seconds until the moon sets, Lupin," Snape said calmly.

The wolf stood up and stretched. A sense of pride made Hermione smile. A werewolf, even under the affects of Wolfsbane, would be going mad at this point in the moon's cycle. Through their testing of new werewolf potions, they'd managed to make the transformation into a wolf, under the full moon, far less stressful and painful.

But there was still some pain during the actual transformation. Hermione gritted her teeth when the wolf began to howl. She watched carefully, but it appeared their latest potion was no different than the last month's version. The wolf twitched and screamed before going rigid. The scream melted into a whine as the fur retracted back into the skin. The snout cracked and reformed back into a human nose. The large teeth shrank. Where a wolf had stood, there was now the collapsed form of a naked man.

Hermione grabbed a beaker from a shelf next to the cage and unlocked the gate. Behind her, she could hear Snape making the preparations for the next phase of the morning. Remus was unconscious when she gently rolled him onto his back and sat him up, supporting his head with her arm as she poured the potion into his mouth. Quickly setting the beaker aside, she massaged his throat to help the potion go down easier. Settling him back on the floor, she reached for her wand.

Wordlessly, Hermione levitated him out of the cage and to a twin bed set up in the middle of the lab and pulled a sheet over his lower half, quite used to his nudity by now. Aware of Remus' aversion to needles, Snape took the necessary sample of his blood while the man slept. Blood sample labeled and set aside for analysis, they set up the heart monitor and Hermione jotted down his heart rate and waited to see if any abnormalities would surface.

Remus's eyes shot open and his heart rate escalated for a few moments before calming once more. Hermione smiled in satisfaction. So there _was_ a change from last month. The last batch had an adverse reaction with the heart, making it useless as it would likely cause cardiac arrest with extended use.

"The coriander seems to counteract the laburnum better than the digitalis purpurea," she said to Snape.

"We'll keep an eye on it, but it appears so," Snape replied.

Before their very eyes, Remus regained his color. Before long, he sat up straight.

"And how are we feeling this month?" she asked in a chipper voice.

"Better than last month," Remus said. "I feel almost normal."

"Perhaps if the coriander is added before the aconite in the Wolfbane, it would have an effect on the pain level," Snape said to Hermione.

"It would have to be timed perfectly or else it would ruin the entire potion," she replied with a frown, writing down a note to look into the lifespan of coriander and its effect with aconite.

"You check him over while I run tests on the blood sample," Snape ordered. "I want to see how his blood reacted to our latest efforts."

With a swirl of his heavy robes, he retreated to his side of the lab, ignoring them completely. Hermione, used to this treatment after working with the man for three years, set aside her clipboard.

"Okay, look right into my eyes for a moment please," she said calmly. Remus did as ordered and she silently cast a diagnostic to check his mental facility through his tawny eyes. Everything appeared to be in order, though it was quite early yet.

Next she checked his physical signs, writing down any changes from last month. The lines about his face had faded somewhat. He wasn't as pale and he'd gained a bit of weight.

"It looks like the _Lupus Abeo_ potion is working better," Hermione said.

"It certainly feels like it," Remus replied warmly. "I haven't felt like this…ever. I almost feel normal."

"I have a feeling we're close, Remus," she said confidently. "With the leaps and bounds we're making, we have to be close."

"Even if we aren't, I'm quite happy with this," he said.

And wasn't that sad? She thought as she fetched his clothes. His life had been so bad up until then that he was happy even though he still had to transform every month. True, they'd taken away nearly all of the other symptoms; the restlessness in the few days before the full moon, the days of incapacitation after, and the general deterioration of physical health. They'd helped many people already, but she wouldn't be satisfied herself until they had a cure for lycanthropy.

When he'd finished putting on his clothes, he clasped her hand warmly.

"Thank you so much, Hermione," he said with a smile. "I don't know how I can ever thank you for what you've done for me."

"It's us who should be thanking you," she replied. "If you hadn't volunteered, we wouldn't be anywhere near where we are."

His smiled widened and he squeezed her hand before taking his leave without a word to Snape, knowing that he'd only get yelled at for interrupting the Potions Master. In any case, they'd be seeing him the next day as it was. Hermione sat on her stool and watched Remus leave, walking upright and confident, something she'd rarely seen on him before he'd come to them.

"Mooning over him won't get your research done," Snape said snidely.

She jumped and looked at her colleague. With a frown, she realized she'd been staring at the empty doorway. She knew that Snape would only get snarkier if she denied she'd been 'mooning' over Remus so she calmly took a deep breath.

"Actually I was thinking about how different he is," she said. "He's healthy and happy, which is so different from when he volunteered to help us test our potions."

"How sweet," Snape replied in a bored tone, measuring a few drops of blood onto a slide for the microscope.

"No, really," she said in irritation. "It's not just him. It's everyone else we've helped. There are so many people who've been living their lives with this curse, thinking that they'd never get better. Aren't you happy for them at all?"

"I'm happy for myself," he replied.

She rolled her eyes. Of course. He was happy for the prestige he was receiving and the money he earned. Both he and Hermione were something of celebrities in the magical science world for their research on lycanthropy and their steps toward a cure.

When she'd approached him with her idea to find a cure after the war, he'd stoutly refused. Standing on the front porch of his dilapidated little house, he'd looked down his ugly nose at her and snarled.

"I will not spend the rest of my life helping those who do not ask me _themselves_ for help!" he hissed. "No, Miss Granger, I intend to enjoy my retirement and only do as I damn well please until the day I die."

And then he'd slammed the door in her face. She'd tried to start the study by herself, but her age worked against her and the Ministry refused to take her seriously. She'd just about given up all hope when she'd gotten the knock on the front door of her Muggle flat. She could never be sure whether it was an inner sense of what is right, or whether he simply got bored with being retired, but Snape came to her and accepted her offer. Of course, he made it seem like the whole idea was his. She didn't care. With a war hero and Potions Master at her side, she received the grant to begin work on finding the cure to lycanthropy.

Three years and millions of galleons (both spent and earned) later, she was known for something other than being the great Know-It-All and Harry Potter's best friend.

Hermione and Snape were well aware that they would not be where they were without Remus. With any study, one needs test subjects. Unfortunately, they'd had no volunteers. But when Remus had heard Hermione talking to Ginny about their grand idea, he'd seemed interested and had offered himself. Hermione was fairly certain he regretted it at first, especially when, on their third full moon together, he nearly died from an allergic reaction to something they'd put in the potion. But now… Now he was almost normal.

And that was an amazing thing. That made all the sleepless nights, the burned eyebrows, and loneliness worth it.

"This needs to sit for twenty-four hours without any more interaction," Snape said, stepping away from his lap station. "We're done for today."

She nodded and together they left their lab before parting ways in the atrium. Wizards and witches were just beginning to arrive for work, appearing in the fireplaces and apparition points with bleary eyes. Just as tired but for completely different reasons, Hermione approached an empty fireplace and went home to sleep the day away.

*

"Apparently the Ministry's trying to bring back the Werewolf Registration Act again," Harry said, fiddling with the peas on his plate.

In the crowded kitchen of the Burrow, seated around the long dining table, talk had turned to the latest workings of the Ministry. Hermione frowned.

"What? Why?" she asked.

"Zealots like Umbrage are still in office," Harry replied.

"And the rest of the Ministry is just going to let them discriminate like that?" Hermione demanded.

"Hermione, there are a lot of people afraid of werewolves," Remus said from next to her.

"They're still people! This is outrageous!"

"It hasn't been passed yet," Harry said calmly. "I'm not sure it's even going to. There might just be enough people who are against it that it'll go away again."

"But there are more who would like the lot of us rounded up and tagged," Remus replied quietly.

"Well I won't stand for it," Hermione said stoutly.

Conversation might have continued down that path had the back door not banged open and Ron Weasley, with his arm around a beautiful blonde witch, stumbled inside with his hair in disarray and his clothes rumpled. The blonde giggled and Ron grinned. His eyes were bloodshot and the skin on his nose and cheeks was streaked with broken blood vessels. He moved to the table and the distinct paunch around his middle was obvious to everyone.

"Hello, Weasley family!" Ron said cordially. "And Harry, Hermione, and Remus of course."

"So glad you could fit us into your busy schedule, Ronald," Mrs. Weasley said icily.

"Not a problem," Ron replied, seating himself between Bill and George, pulling the blond onto his lap. "No games or practice today."

And that's when the night became awkward. Eyes darted from Ron, who either talked loudly about his latest Quidditch win or could be found inspecting the blonde's tonsils with his tongue, to Hermione, who tried to keep her face blank.

But she couldn't help but watch Ron. She could not define her own emotions. Anger was certainly there, but so was sadness with a hint of jealousy. Had she not become a magical scientist with her heart and soul in her work, it might have been her with Ron now. But she followed her dream to become someone of importance for her work, and he followed his to become a professional Quidditch player.

They'd tried, certainly. It seemed almost expected after all their years as friends. And it had been happy and fun for a while. But then she'd gotten her grant to start her work and she was barely home. When she was, he was off somewhere with the team. At first, their arguments had been about their lack of time together. And then the words became nastier.

He called her frigid, boring, and not worth the effort. At those words, she had no reply and therefore packed her things and moved out. Since then, they'd been extremely distant and just barely managed to be civil to each other. She tried only because she loved the rest of the Weasley family.

As the years passed, he fell into further dissipation. She was pretty sure that alcohol was a problem. He needed someone to take care of him and she was pretty sure his blonde of the week was not going to be that person. His family had tried to help at first, but only Mrs. Weasley seemed to be trying to help now.

"So, Hermione," Ginny said when another uncomfortable lull overtook the table. Hermione looked away from the scratches in the top of the table that she was tracing with her fingers and turned her attention to her friend. "I was thinking that burgundy would be too dark a color for the bridesmaid's dresses. It's an afternoon wedding, after all."

"True," Hermione replied with a smirk. "What color did you think of now?"

"Hey!"

"Oh come on, Gin, you've changed the color scheme four times in the last month," Harry said, wrapping his arm around Ginny's shoulders.

"Well, it might help if you gave your opinion," Ginny grumbled. "Fiancé's do more than just show up, you know."

"Not according to your mother."

Ginny shot a look at Mrs. Weasley, who merely shrugged, before turning back to Hermione. "I was thinking violet. It would look smashing on both you and Luna."

Hermione grinned. "I love it, Gin."

"Great, the final fitting is this Saturday. They'll change the color then as well."

"Final fitting?" Ron said, his bleary eyes going wide. "When's the wedding?"

"Next weekend," Harry said, looking at Ron in bafflement. "You didn't forget, did you?"

"I thought it was months away!"

"No, Ron," Ginny said. "May twenty-seventh."

"Fuck me," Ron said in astonishment. "I totally forgot."

"And you wonder why I didn't ask you to be the best man," Harry said darkly.

"Oh, and Longbottom's so great, is he?" Ron said snidely. "Going to have your bachelor party in a greenhouse?"

"At least I can count on him to show up sober," Harry shot back. "I can't even count on you to show up at all. It's a miracle you're even here now."

"What is this?" Ron demanded. "Attacking me in front of my family?"

"He's right, Ron," Bill said, his voice low. "We weren't expecting you to even be here."

Ron seemed too startled to respond at first. And then his focus turned to Hermione. Internally steeling herself for whatever he might say in his drunken state, she pursed her lips. "Is that why Hermione's here?" Ron asked. "Not _too busy_ to be here when you think I won't show up?"

Hermione didn't answer. She didn't need to.

"This is stupid," Ron spat. "You welcome _her_, the fucking frigid ice queen, and treat your own family like an unwanted guest!"

Hermione sucked in her breath, ready to retort, but Harry was quicker.

"How dare you talk about Hermione like that!" he shouted.

"Harry-" she began but he cut her off.

"You left her! You chose this life! Don't blame Hermione because you're selfish!"

The room went still. Ron looked to every member of his family, his bloodshot eyes pleading for someone to come to his aide. Hermione had had enough. She pushed herself to her feet and all eyes trained on her.

"I… I should be going," she said. She mentally cursed herself when her voice came out suffocated. "I have work early in the morning."

"Of course you do," Ron muttered.

The urge to scream at him, to throw something at his head, to slap him, was overwhelming but she did none of those things. Instead, she calmly moved around the table. Someone behind her stood as well but she didn't look back.

"Good evening," she said. "Thank you for the lovely meal, Mrs. Weasley."

She didn't wait for an answer. She shoved her way out the back door and marched past the wards around the yard. But before she could Apparate, someone captured her elbow.

"I just want to go home!" she cried, uncaring of whoever had come out to check on her. Her humiliation was beyond complete.

"I know that, but you tend to splinch yourself when you Apparate when you're upset."

The low, calming voice of Remus Lupin washed over her and she immediately relaxed. Of anyone who could have come after her, he would have been her first choice.

"You're right, I know you're right," she conceded. "I just want to leave."

"Let me get you home in one piece," he said softly. Not voicing a reply, she simply nodded. The pressure on her elbow increased.

The wrenching feeling of being sucked down a tube overwhelmed her. She really hated the feeling of Apparition, but it was convenient and quick and soon enough she was standing outside the door to her flat next to Remus, who still held her elbow.

"Thank you," she said. "That was very gentlemanly of you."

He smiled, his newly-unlined face going slightly pink. "Not a problem. You go inside and have a cup of tea. I'll see you in the morning for my tests."

She nodded and kissed him on the cheek. He seemed about to say something else, his mouth pursing slightly as if words were about to come out, but he stopped. Instead he just smiled further and disappeared with a sharp _crack_.

She let herself into her new chic apartment and then leaned back on the closed door. She was a mess. Part of her was still in love with a man who obviously loathed her, and the other part was hopelessly attracted to a man who would never want her.

No, no she wouldn't let her mind wander that path. It was too depressing. Calmly, she reminded herself that she was _not interested_ in Remus Lupin. He was a dear friend and coworker. She was a serious magical scientist who loved her work and didn't want to complicate it with any man.

Even one as sweet and caring as Remus….

No. Decisively, she pushed herself from her door and made herself a cup of strong tea. She'd curl up with a mystery novel and refuse to think of men.

*

Hermione was alone in the lab when Remus arrived for his daily tests. It had been a few days since the encounter with Ron at the Burrow and she could finally look him in the eye without wanting to cringe in embarrassment.

While the lab was always a more relaxed place when Snape wasn't there, his absence was beginning to worry Hermione. Not only was the man habitually on time, it was very unlike him to miss Remus's testing. Trying not to let her concern show, she continued to check Remus's vitals for any appearance of changes to his system.

"From what I can see, our latest potion only helped with the transformation on the pain level," she said, watching the pattern of his heartbeat on a special monitor that not only showed the beat of his heart in a sound wave, but brought up an image of the full heart itself. "It doesn't appear to be helping your body any more. There aren't any signs of stronger internal organs. You're sure you haven't forgotten a day in there somewhere?"

"I'm positive, Hermione," Remus replied patiently.

Hermione frowned and scanned her notes once more. The previous potion had both helped with the transformation and battled against the curse's attacks on the body which caused it to age prematurely. But that had been the one that had an adverse reaction to the heart and therefore was useless. The newest potion only seemed to help the transformation go easier. There were no signs of it in his system at all. Already the curse was starting to eat at his body again. She could see signs of fatigue and the muscle development that he'd been working on was slowing.

"You haven't changed your work-out regime at all?" she asked.

"No," Remus said firmly. "Now that I can actually do it without hurting myself, I work out every day."

Hermione could tell, but she'd only embarrass him if she mentioned that she rather enjoyed his newly toned body. Remus Lupin happened to be a health nut. During their first week together on this project, he told her how he had been strict with his diet because he didn't want to be weak every day of his life. He couldn't work out, per se, because it only made him tired. But he ate well and took good care of himself which is the only reason his body hadn't aged further.

Now they were fighting the signs of age and reversing them. Unfortunately, it seemed their latest potion was a failure.

"Okay, here's what we have to do," she said. "This last potion was obviously a failure, but it was the first of its kind so I'm not going to get angry. At least, not while you're here. Combining the regenerative potion and the transformation potion didn't work. For now I'm going to put you back on the old regenerative potion because I'm not happy with the changes in your muscles. Stop taking the new one. I'm scrapping that potion."

"Why?"

"Because the old potion appears to provide a better result. Instead of working on the next level of regeneration, I'm going to talk to Snape and see about turning our focus on the full cure. We have a decent start, but we've been too focused on seeing if we could just make an all-in-one pain relief and healing potion."

"I don't mind taking several different things, Hermione," he said with a smile.

"I know you don't," she replied petulantly. "And I know that no one else minds either, but…"

"You just wanted to make it easier for us."

She nodded. Still smiling, he took her hand and squeezed it. She felt a blush rise in her cheeks and turned away, tugging her hand back. Moving to the cupboard where she stored the potions, she pulled down a week's supply.

"Take this every night," she said, handing him the bottle.

"I know the drill," he replied wryly.

"So humor me," she said smiling. "Come in day after tomorrow and-"

The door to the lab banged open and Hermione jumped. Both she and Remus looked over to the open doorway to see Snape charging in. His face was mottled with rage and his hands were bunched into fists as though he were waiting for the right person to punch in the face. Hermione and Remus stayed silent as Snape came to a stop before them, his anger radiating off him in waves. "We work in an environment of imbeciles," Snape growled through clenched teeth.

Hermione cleared her throat and almost squeaked when those furious black eyes trained on her. Fighting the urge to run as fast as her legs would take her, she asked, "Erm, what happened?"

"The new Werewolf Registration Act has passed," he snapped. Remus went rigid. "But there's a _twist_. Out of fear of the public outcry over the word 'registration', they've turned it into a Marriage Act. All werewolves working within the Ministry must be wed to a person _not_ afflicted to lycanthropy to show their _domesticity_."

"What?" Hermione cried. "But that makes no sense! Why would they do that?"

"Because this way they can have werewolves on record without actually using the term 'registration'," Snape snarled. "'Registration' can mean anyone would be next. With this marriage law only for werewolves, the general population will raise fewer objections as werewolves in society are rare, and even _rarer_ are ones that work inside the Ministry itself."

"But what's this rubbish about domesticity?" Hermione demanded. "What on earth does that even mean?"

Snape opened his mouth to reply, but it was Remus who answered her. "It has to do with the animal side of our condition. It only appears around the full moon, but many seem to think that it's always present. I'd wager the domesticity part is to show that a werewolf can live happily with another person and live a normal life."

"That's utter shite!" Hermione said, stomping her foot. "They're using that as an excuse!"

"Correct," Snape said.

"Why are you so angry, Severus?" Remus asked mildly. "You've never seemed to care about werewolves in the past."

"I couldn't care less if the lot of you were rounded up and put in a pen," Snape barked. Hermione gasped. "You could vanish and I wouldn't blink an eye. But what this law means to my research is that it will be put aside unless your sorry arse can wed within the month!"

"I'm not a Ministry employee," Remus replied. Hermione was amazed at his level of tolerance.

"You are paid by the Ministry," Snape said. "That makes you a Ministry employee. According to the law department, you must stop immediately. You are not permitted to come back until you can have proof of your marriage. Luckily it doesn't limit who you're allowed to be wed to. So find _someone_ and make it _quick_."

Remus just stared at him. Hermione didn't know what to say. She hated Snape at the moment for how he had spoken to Remus, but he was right about their research. Remus was their only test subject. And even if he didn't come back, they were still bound by the limitations of this preposterous law. Their other test subjects were also unmarried. Remus had once told them it was because no one wanted a werewolf as a spouse.

"If you want to get better," Snape said, his voice barely above a hiss, "If you want a cure, you will get married. Otherwise, tell me now and I'll go back into retirement."

"I…" Remus looked completely lost.

It was then, as Hermione's eyes shifted from Remus, who looked like he was about to be sick, to Snape, who looked ready to kill, that an idea struck her. Sure, it was not the best answer, but…

"Remus," Hermione said hesitantly. His tawny eyes caught hers and her heart broke a little. He was so obviously crushed. "Remus, I have an idea. You probably won't like it, but it doesn't have to be forever and I just want to help, but…"

"For God's sake, spit it out Granger!" Snape roared.

"I could marry you!" It came out panicked. She'd hoped for confident, but Snape had scared her into speaking prematurely. Remus, however, still stared at her dumbly. His eyes, which she had always found beautiful, were blank. Face was pale and his mouth was slightly open.

But Snape, apparently, was not patient enough to wait for the shock to wear off. He reached out and shook Remus's shoulder and said, "Answer her!"

"It doesn't have to be permanent," Hermione said quickly. "It would just be for convenience right now. This way you can keep your job here and we can continue our research."

"But," Remus started. Snape sighed explosively and crossed his arms, glaring at the werewolf with pure anger. "But I don't want to get in the way of your life, Hermione. This isn't fair to you."

"Remus, you wouldn't be in my way," she said. "I don't date, or anything so… wait. If you're seeing someone, then that's a different matter."

Suppressing the urge to repeatedly smash her face into the nearest flat surface and say 'Stupid!' with every blow, she twisted her fingers together and waited for his response.

"No, no I'm not seeing anyone," he said. Hermione sighed in relief. "But this is so…"

"I know, but we can't really afford the time that could be lost," Hermione said. "I know this isn't fair, to anyone. But if you're agreeable, we can do this and then continue with the research. It wouldn't really change anything…"

He scrubbed one hand through his hair, which had only recently begun to go back to its natural light brown. The grey had started to vanish. If he was taken off of their potions… He'd revert completely to how he used to look.

"I'm sorry Hermione," he said finally without looking her in the eye. "I just can't. It's not fair to you. What if you do meet someone? You're young, and I refuse to ruin your life this way."

Without another word, he left the lab, leaving Hermione and Snape staring after him. The silence only lasted for ten seconds before Snape rounded on her. "Go and fix this," he growled. "Go and fix this, now, or else everything I've worked for ends."

At her wits end, she stood to her full height (still seven inches shorter that him) and firmed her jaw.

"Why don't you marry him, then?" she demanded. Snape face melted from anger to shock. "I'll go talk to him, I'll try to change his mind but if you continue to speak to me like that, I'll walk from this project. Which, by the way, was my idea in the first place. And I can promise you that if I leave, you'll never get another partner to work for you as hard as I have."

Whether or not he was going to reply, Hermione would never know. She stormed from the room before he had a chance.

Remus had already made his way through the Department of Mysteries and was standing by the lifts, waiting for one to arrive.

"Remus!" she called. His shoulders stiffened before he turned to face her.

"Hermione, don't," Remus said, shaking his head.

"Remus, please," she said, coming to a halt before him. "It doesn't have to be me. It can be anyone, but we need you. You're the hope for so many people! I would happily marry you to keep that hope alive."

"You have no idea what you're saying," he said, turning away from her. "Marriage isn't something to take lightly."

"It wouldn't be a real marriage!" she cried, losing her composure. "It would be on paper!"

"You wouldn't be able to have a chance at a real marriage until this law is repealed, which may never happen! Or until your research is concluded and we don't know how long that will be!"

"For Merlin's sake, Remus," Hermione said with a small smile. "You're turning me down because you want me to have a real relationship someday?"

He shrugged, still turned away from her. She reached for his hand and pulled him around so that she could look him in the eye. He was taller than Snape, so she had to drop her head back. Still smiling, she said, "I don't date. I don't do relationships. If I had the hope of one day finding the perfect man and starting a family with a white picket fence and a dog, I wouldn't offer myself this way. I'm too selfish." He looked like he was about to interrupt but she shook her head, silencing him. "I am, I admit it. But I don't want that. Do you?"

He closed his eyes for a moment before replying heavily, "No, not really."

"Then let's just do it," she said. "If, in the future, either of us finds someone who evokes the dreams of white picket fences, we'll jump that hurdle when we get there. But I don't think it's ever going to happen for me, so don't say no for my sake."

He smiled, but it was a smile of regret. Her heart sank. He was going to say no. They were going to have to stop their research. Her job, her work, was gone.

Remus sighed heavily. "I'll do it," he said finally.

She blinked. "You… what?"

"I'll marry you," he said. She stared at him in surprise for several heartbeats. The smile that began to pull at his mouth was part amusement, and part sadness.

"I… okay. Good. Well. Let's, uh, get to it."

Remus nodded, and while she was elated, part of her couldn't help but focus on the sad smile plastered to his mouth.

*

She knew that Remus didn't look at it as a real marriage, and even though she'd had feelings for him for a long time, this could not be considered anything other than a business arrangement, even for her. Once the documents had been signed and the gold rings had appeared on their fingers, they were given news that neither of them had considered.

"We'll need your new address as soon as poss-"

"New address?" Hermione interrupted. "What do you mean?"

"The two of you must live together, Mrs. Lupin," the official said. Hermione ignored her new name and shot a look at Remus, who again looked like he was about to be sick.

"We were not told that," she said tightly.

"Well how else would married couples live?" the official said with a giggle. The woman was plainly too old for giggling, with her white helmet of curls and the deeps lines spreading from around her blue eyes. "According to the law, you're to reside under one roof, though either may move into the other's current home. You're also to appear before a counselor every four months so that we can oversee you're… uhm…"

"_Domesticity_," Hermione snarled.

"Yes, exactly," the official said with giant grin. "Congratulations! Now you're free to leave. I have another appointment in a few minutes…"

The damage done, they left. Outside the office, Snape left to go back to the lab. Hermione told him they'd be there in a few moments and with one look between her and Remus, he gave her a nasty smirk and disappeared down the corridor with his robes trailing behind. Swallowing her unease, she turned to her new husband.

"Ah… well…" Hermione winced. She couldn't think of a single thing to say.

"Well," Remus said. With a deep breath, he looked her with a forced smile and said, "Your place or mine?"

*

It was decided that between their two flats, hers was the better choice. It was slightly bigger and had a much better kitchen. Unfortunately, there was only one bedroom and one bathroom.

"If it weren't a Muggle building, I'd say we could just make another room," Hermione said apologetically.

"No, we can't do that," Remus replied, looking around her living room. For reasons she couldn't understand, she was nervous. It was like she was waiting for him to announce his displeasure with her home.

Of course he never would. Even if Remus loathed every bit of it, he would never say anything. He wasn't that kind of person. But a small part of her desperately hoped that he liked it, because she felt that her décor was almost a part of herself.

Her little living room held a burgundy sofa and two matching chairs settled around a vintage coffee table she picked up from a little shop that sold antiques. She had a fireplace with two bookshelves on each side made of wood that matched the floors. It was the hardwood floors that really sold her on the flat. They were mahogany and so shiny that she could slide across the floor in her socks if the mood moved her. And it did fairly regularly.

She made a mental note to curb her passion for floor-sliding when Remus was home.

But he seemed to like her place, which was a relief. After some debate, they decided that he'd camp out in the living room on a transfigured bed that they'd just vanish during the day. She felt horrible that he was forced to sleep in the living room of all places, but they couldn't exactly share the bedroom. It was bad enough that there was only one bathroom.

"Um, no offence Hermione," Remus said slowly while she showed him the little restroom. She turned to him curiously. "I'm not going to fit in that shower."

She looked from her little shower stall to his broad shoulders. He was right. While the stall was comfortable for a woman of Hermione's petite (alright, short) frame, Remus was quite a large man.

"Perhaps we could move things around and make it larger?" she said. "As long as we keep the magic on a minimum, I don't think it will hurt the balance of the building too much."

Without making the actual room bigger, they managed to switch things around so that there were two sinks and a wider shower. It was more cramped, but they'd manage.

"Where does that second door lead?" Remus asked, pointing to the door next to the sink.

"Oh, my closet," Hermione replied. "The bathroom attaches to the master bedroom that way. I added the door because I didn't want to have to walk all the way across the flat to the bathroom."

"Ah," he replied, looking slightly uncomfortable.

"Well," she said loudly. "I think we'll be set! If we have any problems, let's just be straightforward with each other. You certainly won't hurt my feelings."

"The same goes for me," Remus said. "If I'm in the way, just let me know."

And that was the beginning of their new living arrangement. That night went by with no problems and when time for bed came, they managed not to bump into each other in the bathroom. He didn't leave anything behind or on the counters. He was quite neat. Hermione made sure not to leave her toothbrush lying out like she usually did after she was done getting ready for bed. For some reason the very thought was embarrassing.

Merlin, she was silly. But she still put the toothbrush in her drawer.

*

When Hermione woke up, she didn't even open her eyes as she shoved her blankets off and got up from her bed. On autopilot, she shuffled to her closet and through the door into the bathroom. Not turning on the light, she moved over to the toilet and made to sit down.

Due to her lack of love for the mornings, her brain had not quite kicked into gear yet. It was because of this that she forgot that the bathroom had been changed around. She ended up falling on her bum with a loud yelp in her new shower, which was placed where the toilet _used_ to be.

Before she could figure out what had happened, there was urgent knocking at the bathroom door.

"Hermione?" someone called. Who was in her flat? "Are you alright?"

Recognizing the voice, the previous day suddenly flooded back into her startled mind. She was married. She was married to _Remus Lupin_, who she'd had a slight crush on for longer than she cared to admit. On top of that, he was living with her and currently outside her bathroom door while she was sprawled in the shower with her pants and knickers around her ankles.

"I'm fine!" she called back, scrambling to pull her pants up. "I'm perfectly fine! Don't worry!"

"Alright," he called back, not sounding convinced.

Her face burning in humiliation, she put herself together and managed to find her toilet. While she was going through her morning routine, a wonderful aroma was getting stronger. It was coming from the kitchen. Teeth brushed (and toothbrush stashed once again), she left the bathroom and entered the kitchen, only to come to a complete halt when she saw the kitchen table.

There was food…everywhere. Heaps of eggs, bacon, and toast. A fresh pot of coffee settled next to a plate of fruit. Hermione almost whimpered. Remus was at the counter fixing a cup of coffee for himself. He was still in his pajamas. Hermione almost blushed when she saw his bare feet.

"You made food," she stated, trying to keep her voice natural.

Remus turned away from the counter and grinned. His hair wasn't even combed yet. "Most important meal of the day. I didn't know what you liked, so today you're getting a bit of everything."

"Did you go out already this morning?" she asked, sitting at the table.

"Most of this I brought from my flat," he replied, seating himself across from her. "I have the place cleaned out and ready to be rented out. I thought it would be smart to just bring my food. Do you mind?"

"Absolutely not," she said, staring at the plate of toast. She loved toast. And he made perfectly toasted toast.

She ate breakfast for the first time in five years because she didn't want to hurt his feelings by saying that she usually waited until midday to eat. She found that she got hungry sooner if she ate in the mornings, but he went to so much trouble and the toast was really just too perfect to pass up.

She insisted on cleaning the kitchen because he had cooked, and after a half-hearted debate he finally relented. In remarkably good spirits considering that it was still morning, she practically skipped to her bedroom. On her way through the living room she found that the bed had been transfigured back into a couch and that all of his things were already put away. She hummed to herself as she got dressed and slipped on her shoes.

She only needed to comb her hair and pull it back and she would be ready to go. She opened the door to the bathroom, completely forgetting that Remus had said that he was going to take a shower.

Luckily, he wasn't completely starkers. Only half-starkers. He had a towel about his waist and a toothbrush in his mouth. His hair was sticking in all directions from where he'd obviously rubbed a towel over it. His startled eyes caught hers and for several heartbeats, they only stared at each other.

She told herself later that it was just a reflex. All women glanced at a man's naked chest if it was openly on display, no matter who the man was. Of course, her glance was more of a _look_, but that was splitting hairs.

He looked like something out of one of those magazines that she secretly got a subscription to. One of the ones that had a 'Naked Man of the Month' pull-out that had the model's favorite book and quote in the corner. He was finely muscled, obviously someone who put a lot of work into his body. He looked like one of those swimmers in the Olympics, though he was admittedly hairier. His chest and sternum had a fine covering, though not enough for someone to think about shaving words into it as a prank while he was asleep. Scattered down his arms and chest were faded scars that he'd picked up from his long life under the werewolf curse. And she couldn't help but follow the line of hair all the way down to where it disappeared into the towel.

"Um, Hermione?" he said. Her eyes shot back to his and her cheeks blushed bright red. "Did you need something?"

"Hairbrush," she squeaked. Reaching blindly for the drawer where she kept her hair products, she grabbed her brush and fled, wishing that a hole would appear in the floor so that she could vanish forever.


	2. Chapter 2

Hermione had lived with four roommates for seven years when she'd been at Hogwarts. Of course, they'd been teenage girls and not fully-grown men; still, she understood compromise.

After a slightly bumpy start she and Remus finally settled into a routine. Remus, being a morning person, would wake up before Hermione and have his time in the shower. When he was finished, Hermione would take her bathroom time while he made breakfast. She would clean up after they ate while he went to his makeshift bedroom and put away his things and put the couch back to its original shape.

In the evenings, Hermione could shower and have the bathroom for however long she wanted. Of course, she felt bad staying in the one and only bathroom for an extended time, so her usual time for relaxing evening showers had been cut in half. But that was her personal choice.

Overall, it wasn't a bad situation.

That didn't mean it was free of embarrassing moments. She'd walked in on him in the bathroom again which led to them creating a system to let the other know if the bathroom was taken. They'd simply spell the door blue until they were finished. Remus had also seen her in her bra and knickers because she forgot to close her bedroom door. What made it truly mortifying for her was that she'd been wearing the most boring underwear in her entire wardrobe. Why couldn't she have been wearing something that didn't scream _FRIGID_ even to her?

A few evenings before Remus had gone out for a drink with Harry and a few others and she'd thought she'd have the flat to herself for a while. Unfortunately Remus came back earlier than expected while she was having a sock-sliding marathon while listening to the soundtrack of Footloose. It wouldn't have been so bad had she not been wearing her holey boxer shorts and tank top. But the icing on the cake was that she hadn't noticed him right away and was singing 'Let's Hear it For the Boy' as loud as she could.

The man didn't even make fun of her. It was almost more embarrassing because he didn't even laugh. Oh he smiled, but it was a very patronizing one. Well. It was to her at least. Ever since that episode, she was afraid to turn on her music at all.

But compared to how awful the situation could have been, life wasn't too bad. In the week since their marriage, they'd been able to get closer as friends.

For instance, Hermione appreciated Remus's odd little quirks. Like his need to have everything put away when not in use. Her flat had never been so organized. She'd never really had the time or inclination to keep things tidy because she'd always been so focused on her work. Now, the flat was clean and neat. Of course, she didn't know where most of her things had gone, but she could always ask him if she ever had the need to.

He also loved food. The man could cook and he did every morning and evening. She'd always wondered why he hadn't bought a new flat of his own when he'd suddenly gotten steady paychecks from the Ministry. Now she knew. Instead of buying furniture or other new things, he bought the best food money could buy. Part of her was amused, but the other part was even angrier on his behalf. He'd never been able to afford as much food as he wanted in the past. So she let him cook enough food for a small army and ate whatever he put in front of her. If this kept up, she'd have to start working out with him because there was no way she'd still fit in her clothes with the sheer amount that she ate.

Hermione found that she could also talk to Remus about anything. It appeared that he felt the same because the night before Harry and Ginny's wedding, they were sitting in the living room and their conversation soon became rather intimate. She was going to go over her notes from work because the full moon was the following week, but she lacked the incentive to actually work. Remus was on the couch, which hadn't made its nightly transformation yet. He was reclined with a book and had an adorable frown between his eyebrows as he focused on the pages.

Holding onto her Gryffindor courage, she finally asked the question that had been niggling at her for years.

"How is it that you're still single?" she asked.

Remus raised his eyes from his book, the frown still in place. "Hm?"

Hermione smiled. "I was just wondering why you're still single."

"I'm not exactly a catch, Hermione," he replied wryly.

"Yes you are," she said. He snorted. "No, really. You are! You cook, you clean, you're smart. And I have it on very good authority that you're quite fit."

His cheeks went slightly pink and she laughed. It was a testament to how far that they'd come that she could even mention the unfortunate incident in the bathroom.

"I may be all those things, but I'm still a werewolf," he said, placing his book on the coffee table. "And while some people may look beyond that, they're hard to find."

"Well, you already know my feelings on that subject," she said primly. "But hasn't there been anyone since…"

His face, which she had come to know quite well, went slightly pained.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "I shouldn't have mentioned it."

"No, it's okay," he replied. "It was a long time ago. Tonks was… She was wonderful. I loved her very much. And no, no one since her death. It just didn't seem right."

_Seven years_, she thought in amazement. He could still love someone seven years after her death.

"I think I understand that," she said warmly.

"What about you?" Remus asked with a tilt of his head. "No one for you since Ron?"

She shifted uncomfortably, but figured she'd asked for it. It was only fair.

"Nope," she said with forced levity. "I'm too busy. And I think I do better alone."

"Of course, it's none of my business."

She shifted again, but there was an odd feeling inside of her. She'd never really been able to talk about it with anyone because all of her friends were either Weasley's or had been friends with Ron. Here was a chance for her to talk, to maybe get another voice about the whole situation. She looked at him closely, but he was looking at the fireplace.

"He said I worked too much," she said finally. "He said that I cared more for my work than I did for him." Remus looked back at her and she smiled sadly. "Maybe he was right. From there, the argument turned from my work habits to my personal habits. He said I was boring, frigid. That I wasn't worth the effort." She cringed at the memory. "And, damn it, I couldn't even think of what to say! I just stood there stupidly as he said those things and couldn't form a reply. He left me then. Off to become a Quidditch player, with the fame, the money, and the women."

Remus didn't say anything, but there was a darkness to his eyes that both scared Hermione and made her want hug him, because he was angry for her.

"But you know what?" she continued with cold satisfaction. "He's a mess now. He's turned into a total disaster while I've made a name for myself. I'm respected and I'm saving lives while he's turned into a bloated shell of what he used to be. And that isn't my fault. It's not."

"Of course it's not your fault," Remus said lowly.

"That's right. It's not. But sometimes… Sometimes I wonder that if I had done something different, if I had changed one little thing, that maybe it would have worked. Maybe it is partly my fault…"

"No," Remus said firmly. "It is not. Ron Weasley made all the choices that got him where he is today."

"You're right, of course," she said, running a hand over her hair. "It just makes me sad, looking at him now. Sometimes I really want to kick him, but sometimes I just want to help."

"It's in your nature to help people," Remus said kindly. "Right up there next to the need to boss people around."

She laughed and all the sadness, the anger, drained from her. Remus was back to his kind self, all hints of darkness gone. She almost wanted it to come back. It had been oddly exciting.

"What a pair we are," he remarked. "I've stayed single for a dead woman and you have the conflicting needs to both harm and nurture your ex."

"We're a mess," she said with a smile. "And with that, I need to go to bed. The wedding of the century takes place tomorrow and I'm the maid of honor."

They stood at the same time and before Hermione could move past him, he took her arm and pulled her into a tight hug. Her pulse throbbed in her ears and her breath caught. She was still too raw from their conversation, too emotional. But it felt so good to be wrapped in his strong arms. She sighed and relaxed into him.

_This was a mistake. _He could never be hers. But she took the moment and let herself feel him.

"Good night, Hermione," he said as he released her.

"Good night, Remus," she replied. She didn't look back as she went to her room and fell into a restless sleep.

*

"So do you feel different? Now that you're a married woman?"

Seated at the main table in the backyard of the Burrow, Hermione and Ginny had their heads together. All around them were the sounds of knives and forks, champagne being poured and happy voices. Ginny was gorgeous in her white gown and headpiece of daisies. She had a definite glow about her, while Harry looked a little stunned. The wedding had been perfect.

"You tell me," Ginny replied. "You've been at it longer than I have."

Hermione snorted. "You know I don't count. Now, come on. Any strange, post-wedding differences to your mental state?"

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Ever the scientist. Right now I just feel extremely happy and on my way to floaty, if my champagne glass keeps getting refilled."

Hermione grinned and made a production of filling Ginny's glass for her. Not long after, the toasts began. Neville was obviously nervous, but he didn't fumble and his heartfelt speech made everyone smile and sigh, until the very end when he surprised everyone.

"Ginny, you look absolutely beautiful," he said with a grin. "I think every man here will agree with me when I say that it is a day of great sadness for the rest us." The crowd gave a predictable 'aw' in response and Neville nodded, still smiling. "And Harry, I think every woman here will agree that today is just another day."

The laughter and applause was long for that one.

Unfortunately it appeared that everyone wanted to give the happy couple a toast. With each speech, Hermione's glass was filled and it got to the point where she wasn't quite sure just how much she'd had to drink. But that didn't worry her too much. After all, this was a celebration! And she didn't even have to worry about driving. Thank Merlin for the Floo network.

After the twins finished their speech, which was lascivious enough to make everyone turn a little pink, a dance floor appeared in the middle of the lawn. Harry and Ginny stood and made their way for their first dance as a married couple. Hermione took that time to go and find her own date and maybe a drink that didn't have any alcohol in it.

She found Remus seated at a table with the rest of the Weasley family, sans Ron who hadn't been seen since the ceremony. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had just stood to have their dances with the newlyweds, so Hermione took the empty seat by Remus.

"Aren't there any non-alcoholic drinks here?" she asked, her voice a little slurred. The incredulous looks she received in response was answer enough.

Remus smiled and put his arm around the back of her chair. Hermione smiled in satisfaction. Wasn't that nice? She settled back and watched the dance floor in amusement. Harry really couldn't dance to save his life.

"More champagne?" Fred asked magnanimously, pouring before she could decline. She stared at the glass in consternation.

"Come on, Hermione," Remus said with a grin. "You don't have to work in the morning."

"True," she replied. "I'm just used to being the responsible one."

"Let someone else be the responsible one this time. It's your best friend's wedding. I think you are allowed to get a little drunk."

"Well, I'm well on my way," she said with a mock toast to no one in particular.

A few minutes later one of the twins started tapping his glass with a fork and soon everyone joined in. All attention focused on Harry and Ginny, who were circling the dance floor together once again. While Harry turned bright red, Ginny reached up with a laugh and pulled him into a deep kiss. Catcall and whistles abounded. A few minutes later, the other twin started it all over again.

Hermione looked at Remus, who was smiling, and laughed.

"If the twins stay much longer, Harry and Ginny will end up having to kiss every five minutes," she said.

"Something tells me that they won't mind very much," Remus replied. Hermione almost shivered as his breath hit the shell of her ear. Was his arm tighter around her than before?

"Okay, everybody listen up!" Fred called out. The crowd hushed, with the exception of a few drunk giggles coming from somewhere in the back. "The next time someone starts tapping the glass, I think that _all_ newlyweds here today should kiss!"

This was received with a loud round of applause and no sooner had the clapping and cheering ended when Fred started tapping his champagne glass with his spoon, and looking pointedly at Hermione and Remus.

Hermione frowned. Everyone knew that her marriage to Remus was only one of convenience. They'd told their friends themselves. But soon all attention focused on them when Harry and Ginny had concluded their necessary kiss and Fred still hadn't stopped hitting his glass.

"Oh dear," Hermione murmured.

"Just come here," Remus muttered. "I can't stand that noise much longer."

She looked up at him in alarm, but he was already leaning down, his tawny eyes falling closed. To her, the moment felt like it lasted for hours. The ringing noises of hundreds of glasses being tapped melted away and all she could hear was her own pounding heart. When his lips, surprisingly soft, met hers, she couldn't stop her sigh.

It was supposed to be quick. That was all the custom demanded. But he didn't pull back, and neither could she. Dimly she heard the loud cheering, the whistles, and the catcalls, but she couldn't focus on them. Her entire world at the moment was those lips, and then his large hand as it cupped the back of her head. Pure pleasure floated through her body and under her hand she could feel his heart pounding in his chest. She was sure that she could have spent the rest of her life just like that.

"Oi!" George called. "There are children present! Somewhere…"

Hermione and Remus parted, each looking at the other in shock. At the exact same time, they each reached for their glasses and took a deep gulp of champagne. After that, Hermione felt the night improved.

By the time the cake was cut and Harry and Ginny carefully fed each other a piece, Hermione was a little bit passed pleasantly buzzed. By the time the bouquet was tossed and caught by a surprised Luna, and the garter was thrown and caught by a laughing George, Hermione was on her way to being pissed. But she was not alone. No, indeed. Her husband (in name only, of course) was inebriated as well and never left her side. Luckily, they were both happy drunks.

Laughing and dancing rather badly, they had a wonderful time. Not too long after Harry and Ginny departed, with the cheers of everyone following them, Hermione and Remus decided it was time for them to go as well. Stumbling into the kitchen with their arms firmly wrapped about each other's waists, where most of the Weasley family was once again congregated, they cheerfully, and loudly, said their goodbyes.

"Goodbye! I love you all!" Hermione said happily. Everyone replied in kind.

"We'll see you next weekend for dinner, won't we?" Mrs. Weasley said as they made their way to the Floo, more calls of love following them out.

"Um, you might want to send a note of reminder, because I'm not sure I'll remember this moment tomorrow," Hermione said with a self-deprecating smile.

"Of course, dear," Mrs. Weasley said with a hug. Remus laughed gaily and hugged the Weasley matriarch before tugging Hermione with him into the Floo, where Hermione called her address. They landed without grace on their rear ends, barely missing the sharp corner of her coffee table. But they were still laughing and the look Remus was giving her, of delight and heat, sent warmth through her body all the way to her toes. She couldn't help but give him the same look.

He pushed himself to his feet and gallantly held his hand out to her. With a bit of swaying, she managed get upright while clinging to his hand. When both of them were standing, she found herself much too close to him. But he didn't move away. They looked at each other for a long moment while the room spun around them. She didn't release his hand.

With the floor rolling pleasantly under her feet, she slowly made her way to her bedroom. But she was not alone, and she did not go to sleep. Not for a long time.

*

The light hurt her eyes. The light had never hurt Hermione's eyes before, so she didn't know what else to do but keep her eyes shut. Just barely peeking them open made her want to shriek. Perhaps she'd just sleep until the odd feeling passed.

She squirmed deeper into her bed. That was when she realized a few things. One, there was something around her midsection. Two, there was something heavy in bed next to her. And three, something was on her breast.

Braving the wrath of the light inside her room, she slowly opened her eyes. While she didn't shriek, she did groan.

Swallowing the sand in her mouth, she shoved her covers aside and peered at her chest. Her lavender bridesmaid's dress was scrunched between her ribs and hips. Her knickers had vanished. But what was truly baffling was that there was a large hand on her breast. A very large hand.

Pushing aside more of her covers she inspected the bed next to her. This time she did shriek, though she wished immediately that she hadn't. Not only did it make her head feel like it was about to split, but it awakened the person beside her.

Remus lurched upright, his hand flying from her breast to his head, and immediately moaned. While Hermione's head throbbed, she was more alarmed by the fact that she was practically naked in bed with Remus Lupin, whose shirt was still on but completely unbuttoned. Clutching the covers to her chest, she stared at him bewilderment.

"What the bloody hell?" he muttered.

"Remus?" she whispered. His pinched eyes met hers and they both went perfectly still. "What are you doing in my bed?"

He looked completely perplexed. "I have no idea."

The wedding…the toasts… The last thing Hermione remembered was dancing merrily at the wedding. She must have had too much to drink. It appeared that Remus had done the same. But why was he in her bed?

"I'll just… be going," he said slowly. "I'm sorry to have intruded."

"It's, ah, not a problem at all," she replied.

He made to push the covers off but stopped. He looked mortified. "Um, Hermione?"

"Yes?"

"I'm not wearing any trousers."

Her eyes widened and she looked at her lap. Oh dear.

"I'll just, ah, not look," she said, turning her back to him.

"Thank you," he said. His voice was oddly high. Behind her, she could hear him moving around and probably picking up his clothes. When the door clicked softly, she turned back and found that he was gone.

He wasn't wearing any trousers. Her knickers had vanished. That did not spell good news. She lurched out of bed and stood straight. It had been a long time, but from what she could remember, she should be able to tell if there were any residual… sensations of intercourse. She twisted this way and that, bent forward and side to side, but felt nothing.

She shook her head. It didn't make any sense. She walked around the foot of her bed to head to the bathroom when she found her knickers near the door. With a gasp, she remembered.

They'd barely made it inside her bedroom before they were on the floor again. For a drunk man, he'd been very adept at removing her shoes and knickers. She blushed. He did things with his hands and mouth that _no one_ ever had before.

Hermione looked back at the bed. Oh dear, oh dear. She'd done things to Remus that Ron had begged her to do to him a long time ago, but she never had. She and Remus hadn't had intercourse, but they'd done just about everything else.

Oh, _God_.

There was a crash from the living room. She hurried to her bedroom door and pulled it open, her heart in her throat. Remus was standing in the middle of the room, thankfully wearing trousers, and staring off into space. A lamp was shattered on the floor by his feet. His head suddenly swung around and he looked right at her, a look of complete astonishment on his face.

With mirroring movements, they turned away from each other and Hermione closed her bedroom door.

Oh, this was not good.

*

Four days. Four days of minimal conversation, of not looking at each other in the eye. There had been no breakfasts, no idle chatter by the fire each night. Dinner consisted of whatever was in the refrigerator from a few days before. Remus was rarely at her flat. She had no idea where he went when he wasn't at the lab or at home, but she was too mortified to ask.

At the lab, she left all the talking to Snape. He administered the tests while she made up errands to run while Remus was there. She had a feeling that if this kept up, the Auror office was going to get real sick of her real quick. But Harry was there, and Harry didn't mind if she stopped by.

She was pretty sure that she and Remus were being childish. They were adults and she was positive that there were more mature ways to handle the situation, but she couldn't bring herself to look him in the eye.

She remembered, vividly, some of the moments of that night. Not the whole thing but what she did remember was that she'd been a total hussy. Of course, it had been fantastic, but what on earth had moved her to take him to her _bedroom_? But he didn't fight her either… It was that stupid kiss. She was going to kill the twins. They were dead men the next time she saw them. Dead. That kiss had stirred some… she didn't know, but it was stirred and that led them right to her bedroom where she put her mouth on places that she'd never considered before. Remus had done the same though…

Oh, this was ridiculous. She needed to talk to him. They needed to put this behind them so that they could go back to the comfortable situation they had before.

But there was a sly voice in her mind that taunted her, asking her if she really wanted to pretend like that night had never happened. A night full of passionate kisses and exploring hands. It had been so comfortable, so easy. It had never been so easy with Ron. Of course, it might have just been all the champagne she'd ingested.

It was on the fifth day that she was in the lab. Remus had just left and she was back to testing the coriander's effect on the potion. She didn't hear Snape approach and so was startled into jumping when he was suddenly at her side and said in a loud voice, "Would you care to tell just what, precisely, is wrong?"

Clutching her chest, she glared at him and was fully prepared to ignore him by turning back to her experiment. But the bastard pushed aside the slides of Remus's blood and her notes and crossed his arms, glaring down his nose at her.

"I don't know what you are talking about," she said with a sniff, pulling her slides back.

"Something has happened," he said, pushing the slides away again.

"And what makes you think that?" she snapped, turning to look at him. She stuck her chin out for good measure.

"You practically have 'I recently fornicated' tattooed on your forehead," he said.

"Oh my God," she moaned, burying her face in her hands.

"I don't care if you and Lupin go at it like rabbits, but your work is suffering and there is no time for childish prudishness," Snape continued.

"I really don't think any of this is your business," she said with her face still in her hands. "I'll work harder, but please, never mention this ever again."

Snape huffed and she heard his boot heels clicking away from her. As much as she wanted to hex Snape's face into a permanent mask of a fruit bat, she knew he was right. Her work _was_ suffering. How could she work with the man that she couldn't even look in the eye?

But on the other side, how could she ever talk to him? She'd never been in this situation before and she didn't know what the protocol was with a man who was only a husband of convenience who she practiced drunken oral sex with.

Oh, she was in a deep mess. But luckily there was one person she could talk to, one person who she knew would be honest with her and help her. But only after demanding for all the details.

*

"Ginny, I really need your help on something," Hermione whispered, taking her friend by the arm and propelling her to the backdoor. She checked behind her. No one was looking. Remus was totally focused on his plate. Good. Satisfied that they weren't being watched, Hermione shoved Ginny out the door and pulled her to the middle of the yard.

"Well fine, Hermione," Ginny replied. "But it'd better be good because we're going to miss out on Mum's pie. You know how the twins are with her desserts."

"It's really important," Hermione assured. "A big deal. A huge deal, actually, and I'm quite at a loss. You see, I've never been in the position. Not that you have either, of course, but you seem to me to be the kind of person who won't blush and who will give me your honest opinion. At least, I hope so, because this is a huge deal, and big problem, and-"

"Hermione," Ginny interrupted. She had her arms crossed and was looking at her in barely-concealed irritation. "Just spit it out."

"Remus and I participated in a night of drunken debauchery the night of your wedding and now we can't even look at each other."

Ginny's fiery eyebrows rose almost to her hairline while her mouth quirked up into a smirk. "Oh really?"

"Yes," Hermione confirmed with a nod. "And my work is suffering from it and my home life is a complete disaster."

"I see," Ginny said. She waited a couple of beats before continuing with, "How was it?"

"Ginny!"

"Come on, if it was so bad that you can't look at each other-"

"It wasn't bad!" Hermione hissed. "It's just that we didn't get married for that! We're friends! We don't see each other in that way!"

Ginny snorted. "Oh, please. You've had the hots for Lupin since your third year."

"That is totally untrue," Hermione said stoutly. "There were five years there where I was totally focused on your brother."

"Sure," Ginny said, obviously unconvinced. "You keep telling yourself that. But I'll tell you this, if Ron had been in the same sort of situation that Remus was in, you never would have gone to such lengths to help him."

Hermione's jaw dropped. She wanted to form some kind of denial, but Ginny would see right through it.

"You've been in love with Remus since you were seventeen years old," Ginny said quietly. "Ever since the final battle. You can deny it all you like, but I'm one of your best friends and I know you."

Hermione looked down at her feet, at a total loss. "I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything, not to me," Ginny said. "And I'll tell you another thing; you're husband had a very interesting conversation with my husband a few nights ago."

Hermione's head snapped up. "What? What did he say?"

"I'm not going to tell you," Ginny said and there was a hint of smugness in her voice. "I promised that I wouldn't."

"Oh, that's not-"

"Instead," Ginny continued a little louder. "You should go home and talk to him yourself. You want the awkwardness to end? You take control and fix it."

*

Ginny's words haunted Hermione for the rest of the evening. When they rejoined the family around the kitchen table at the Burrow, Hermione hardly paid attention to anyone around her except Remus. What had he said to Harry? What was Ginny talking about?

But nothing on his face or in his gestures gave any hint of what was going on in his mind. He joked around with the twins, complimented Mrs. Weasley on her food, talked Ministry politics with Mr. Weasley and Harry. It was absolutely maddening.

When they left and went back to her flat, neither said a word. He showed absolutely no change in mood from the whole previous week. He was politely distant and still wouldn't meet her eye. What if Ginny had just been having her on? What if Remus really hadn't had a conversation Harry?

But Hermione couldn't think of a single reason of why Ginny would lie to her. All through her shower she thought back on her conversation with her friend. One thing Ginny had been right on was that Hermione was going to have to take control and at least talk to the man. She couldn't keep walking on eggshells.

After her shower she braided her hair and practiced different ways to start a conversation with her quiet husband, but they all sounded stilted, even to her. When she left the safety of her bedroom, she found him on the couch with a book in his hand. This was how he always spent his evenings. She smiled a little. He had one foot on the floor and was reclined into the side of the sofa. The frown was back in place as he read. The man was adorable, even more so because he had no idea.

She could do this. She could go in there and speak to him. She straightened her spine and with a mental _here we go_, she walked into her living room.

"Remus?" she said. He dropped the foot that had been propped up the couch to the floor and sat up straight, his eyes finding hers warily.

"Um, yes?" he replied.

"I think it's time that we talked about, er, last weekend," she said with a slight grimace.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Of course, yes. You're right."

All the speeches that she had worked on in the bathroom mirror suddenly vanished from her mind. Her mouth was open, ready to speak, but her brain had shut down. She could not think of a single thing to say. Remus scrubbed a hand through his hair.

Hermione was about to just apologize and run away when he groaned and dropped his head in his hands.

"I am so sorry," he blurted. "I was a complete ass."

Hermione went still. "Pardon?"

"You were drunk and I took advantage of you," he said in a tortured voice. "I don't know what I was thinking, but I apologize. You have every right to be angry."

"I…what?" She was completely lost. "You… wait. You think I'm angry at you?"

"Aren't you?" he asked.

"No, of course not," she said. His eyes dropped to her hands, which were clasped in front of her.

"I… I'm confused," he said finally.

"I am too," she replied, letting herself fall back into one of her chairs. "I'm the one who should apologize, not you."

"I beg your pardon?" His eyes lifted back to hers and he looked completely baffled. "You didn't do anything wrong."

"Yes I did!" she said fervently, her mouth running ahead of her brain. "I was the one who took advantage of you! I never would have let it get to such a stage! It was all the champagne, you see, and that silly kiss at the wedding. It really wasn't your fault at all because I've fancied you for years and it was a very good kiss and… Oh my God."

Remus was staring at her in amazement. She raised one shaking hand to her mouth and cursed her tongue. She wanted to deny what she'd just said. She wanted to scream that she hadn't meant it, that it was a mistake, but she was so shocked that she just sat there.

"You… you've fancied me?" he said at length.

"Um…" she said intelligently.

"Really?"

He still looked amazed, which was a lot better than scared or disgusted. Taking that as a good sign, she nodded.

"For how long?" he asked.

"Er…"Her hand was still pressed to her mouth. She couldn't seem to move. Seemingly taking pity on her, he reached out and took her hand away to let her speak. He didn't let it go. "Um, a while."

"How long is a while?"

"Well… oh this is mortifying."

He smiled slightly and her heart skipped a beat. "Just tell me," he said.

"Well, I've always sort of fancied you," she said finally. "Ever since the third year, but it sort of escalated at the final battle at Hogwarts."

He blinked. "Why?"

She exhaled loudly and looked past his shoulder. "Okay, truth?" He nodded. "Alright. I've never told anyone, _anyone_, about why I started my research." She looked back at his face and while he looked confused at the change of subject, he looked interested. Still no traces of fear or nausea. That was a good sign.

"On the day of the final battle," she continued, "you had just gone through a full moon. You were weak as a kitten and so sick that you could barely stand up. But when Voldemort invaded the Hogwarts grounds, nothing could keep you in the castle and in bed. I was in the middle of a huge crowd, fighting so many people that it was nearly impossible to keep them straight, when I looked over and there you were."

His eyes, so bright from the light of the fireplace, stared deeply into hers. He was still holding her hand.

"I wanted to scream at you to go back to the castle, to go lay down, but I knew you wouldn't. Instead of fighting with you, I…"

"You came to me," he whispered. "You came over to me as people were dueling all around us, and you cast a protection charm."

"Yes," she said, her throat tight.

"We fought next to each other," he said. "I remember, because I was terrified for you the whole time, but you were brilliant."

"At one point you fell, and I caught you. You were so tired…"

"Weak as a kitten, like you said," he said wryly. "But you held me up. I was amazed that such a little person could be so strong."

"I think it was adrenaline."

"I'm sure." He grinned. "But you helped me. If you hadn't have been there, I would have died. I think… I think I wanted to."

"What do you mean?"she asked. He sighed.

"Hermione, I've hated myself for most of my life." All traces of humor were gone. "I've hated the curse, and the curse is a part of me. By that point, I was ready to be done. I loved Tonks very much, and she was the only reason I kept going. But by the time I made it out onto the grounds that night, I already knew she was gone."

Hermione bit her lips and squeezed his hand.

"I wouldn't let you die, though," she said softly. "I respected you too much by that point to let you give up. I think part of me knew you wanted to go, but the other part was amazed that you would fight so hard when you were so ill. Afterward, in the hospital wing, you were out for days. It was then that the idea to research a cure came to me. I thought it was so unfair that something that wasn't your fault would take over your life like that. So that's why I started it up."

"Because of me," he said.

"Yes," she replied with a smile. "I didn't want you to die. Whether from the curse taking you or at your own hand. So that's when I started to try to be your friend."

"So _that's_ why you were hovering around so much," he said with a laugh. "I couldn't figure out why you were always there. You always had something for us to do. You, Harry, and Ginny."

Funny, Hermione though. Ron had never wanted to help. She set that thought aside for later consideration.

"That's right," she said with a smile.

"Every day you came around," he said with a far-off look. "At first I wanted to throttle you, but after a while it was nice. And when I heard about your research, I knew why I hadn't just killed myself. I had to help. You know… you really are the reason I'm still alive. You've saved me so many times."

"Part of that was because I couldn't let any of my friends be miserable like that," she said. "And also…um…" She swallowed and looked down at their clasped hands. "Also because I was, well, attracted to you. I felt horribly guilty because I knew that you had just lost Tonks and I was thinking about you as… well, I was thinking about you. But I just couldn't seem to help it. I never told anyone."

Her face burned in humiliation and self-disgust. She'd just admitted to having feelings for a man when she'd known he was grieving someone else. What kind of a person was she?

"Don't be embarrassed, Hermione," Remus said kindly. Oh, that made it worse. "We can't help what we feel. I was horrified when I realized that I was attracted to you when you were still dating Ron."

Her head snapped up. "Wait, what?"

"If you have to be honest, then it's only fair that I should be as well," he said with a sardonic smile.

She waited a few moments, the pounding of her heart nearly uncomfortable in her chest, before she spoke again. "What?"

He laughed and moved until he was perched on the very edge of the couch, bringing his face closer to hers.

"I thought myself the worst sort of man when all of a sudden one day I realized that I wanted you for my very own," he said softly. "You were with someone else, twenty years my junior, and much too good for me. But even knowing those things, I wanted you."

"But Ron and I broke up," Hermione said. "Why didn't you ever say anything?"

"Why didn't you?" he countered.

Without hesitation Hermione replied, "Fear of rejection."

"Exactly," he said. "I never once thought you were interested in me beyond me being a friend. A project, even. I figured you just felt bad for me and that's why you were always around. And then why you let me be part of your study."

"Oh dear, that wasn't it at all," she said.

"I see that now," he replied with soft smile.

She felt very strange; her head was oddly light and her heart was warm. It was like one of her dreams had just come true. Remus Lupin, the man she'd secretly fancied, wanted her as well. It was almost too perfect to be real. But it was real. His eyes really were full of _something_, just for her. His hand was really holding hers.

"How silly we've been," she said with a laugh.

"Truly," he replied. "You're very good at hiding your feelings."

"You as well. I had no idea. What do we do now?"

He looked down at their joined hands. His brow puckered into that adorable frown she loved as he considered. Something, old insecurities and years of secret anguish she was certain, made her feel as though he were about to tell her that anything between them was a bad idea, that maybe they should ignore their feelings. It was highly improbable, but still her mind conjured multiple ways for him to let her down easy. After all, he'd said he _had_ been interested in her, not that he still was. Cursing her vivid imagination, she waited.

"I think," he said slowly, and her mind shrieked, "that we should date."

"That we should… what?"

"Date," he said smoothly. "I think we should date."

"We live together," she said in bafflement.

"True, but that doesn't mean that we cannot go out," he said brightly. "You see, I respect you too much to just fall into bed with you. I think that we've proven that we're compatible in that regard." He blushed a little and she was enchanted. "But I'd like… to start at the beginning. To go through the process, as it were."

"I…see," she said slowly.

"So, are you busy this Friday?" he asked with an ironic tilt of his head.

She couldn't help but laugh. "No, I am not busy."

"How about we go see a film?" he offered. "I haven't been to one in ages."

"I'd like that," she said warmly.

And with that, they both stood. Unsure of just what to do now, she squeezed his hand. "I suppose I should be getting to bed."

"Of course," he replied. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Yes." She nodded. She moved in the general direction of her bedroom but he held onto her hand, halting her withdrawal. She looked back at him curiously.

"I know we just started dating," he said with an awkward shuffle of his foot. "But might I just… Excuse me."

Her heart leapt to her throat as he stepped up to her and leaned down. Fighting the urge to grin, she accepted his kiss. He lingered over her lips, the pressure on her mouth heavenly. He barely touched her cheek with his fingertips and she felt cherished. When he pulled back, his eyes were soft. She was fairly certain she was wearing a stupid grin face but she didn't really care.

"Good night," he whispered.

"Good night," she replied. She then floated to her room and went to sleep with a smile on her face.

**Two Years Later**

"She makes it look so easy," Harry said with pure astonishment.

Turning her head, Hermione looked over at Ginny. She was seated like a queen holding court, surrounded by women while holding the sleeping form of James Sirius Potter. Even from all the way across the backyard of the Burrow, Hermione could see the babe sported a beautiful head of bright red hair. Ginny held him effortlessly as she chatted happily with everyone.

"She does, doesn't she?" Hermione murmured.

"She amazes me," Harry said contentedly. "They both do. Even when he's wailing like an Irish Quidditch fan, he amazes me."

Hermione hid a grin behind her hand as she looked at her best friend. "He's got you wrapped around his little finger."

"That he does," Harry said with a sappy grin. "I never thought I'd ever have a family."

"Well you do," she said. "And you're doing brilliantly at the whole business."

His sentimental eyes lit up. "Really?"

She chuckled. "Yes, really. Ginny won't stop talking about how wonderful you are with the baby. '_Oh, he's just so sweet! He looks at James like he's the whole world! It just makes me feel so happy, he's so fantastic and caring and magnificent and_-'"

"Shut it, you," Harry muttered, shoving her with his elbow. She laughed and wrapped an arm around his waist.

"I'm so happy for you, Harry," she said, leaning her head on his shoulder. He sighed and put one of his long arms about her.

"I'm happy for me too," he replied. "You know who else I'm happy for? Remus."

She grinned. "Oh really? And why is that?"

"Because he's got you."

She squeezed him tight. "You're sweet when you put your mind to it."

"I'm serious," he said. "Two years. Can you believe it? We've both been married for over two years."

She looked up at him. "I can believe it. We hit the jackpot in the spouse department. Speaking of which, I'm going to go find mine."

"And I'm going to go relieve mine of a certain new baby," Harry replied, face brightening at the prospect.

She laughed again and patted his back. "You go do that."

Standing by herself for a bit, she watched Harry walk over to the group of women cooing over the new baby. It never failed to make her smile whenever she watched him with Ginny or baby James. He looked at both of them with such love and devotion. The group oohed and aahed as Harry took James into his arms and absently started to rock back and forth. He blushed, but continued to sway, green eyes soft on the sleeping infant's face.

Her sentimental heart sufficiently warmed, she turned and went off to find her own husband. There was quite the crowd at the Burrow that day. The whole family was in attendance, plus Harry and Ginny's closest friends. Mrs. Weasley was in her element as grandmother. She'd insisted on having the Christening party at the Burrow.

"There haven't been enough babies here in a long time," she'd said.

Well now there were plenty. Bill and Fleur had one of their own, George and Luna (Hermione still boggled at that pair) had twins, Percy and Penelope had triplets, and now Harry and Ginny had one of their own.

_And soon,_ Hermione thought, unconsciously running a hand over her own abdomen,_ there will be another._ Not another Weasley, but another baby to add to the general chaos of these family gatherings. She and Remus hadn't shared the news yet, as they had only found out themselves, but they were secretly thrilled.

Every day was like a gift for Hermione. Not to say that there weren't the little annoying things that went with being married, but overall her marriage was wonderful.

After an initial dating period, they'd realized that what had started as attraction had matured into love. It hadn't been sudden, it had been gradual. And perfect. They'd moved out of their flat and into a home not far from the country estate that Harry had bought after his marriage to Ginny. Harry liked the seclusion so that he could get away from the media attention. Hermione and Remus liked it because of the quiet.

Hermione's research was going smoothly. While a complete cure had not yet been found, there was hope. They'd managed to make Remus's monthly transformations nearly painless and all signs of the previous ravages on his body from the curse were gone. Snape was still a git, but not so much to her anymore. Everyone else, yes, but he had finally started treating her like an equal instead of a subordinate.

Hermione found Remus playing cricket with the twins and Charlie. His broad shoulders filled out his shirt wonderfully and his golden-brown hair shone in the light of the sun. All traces of grey were gone. She stood at the edge of the field and watched in amusement as Fred tried to distract Remus while Charlie pitched the ball. Remus swung, connected with the ball with a loud _crack!_ and started to run.

Deciding not to interrupt their game, she turned and absently thought about getting a drink from the house. Heading towards the back door, she was taken completely by surprise when Ron stepped out of the shadows and blocked her path.

He'd fallen into further dissipation over the years. He'd lost his position on the Quidditch team and turned even more to alcohol and, Hermione was certain, drugs. There was no sign of the adorably handsome young man from their school days. In his place was a flabby, red-faced drunk.

"Excuse me," she said stiffly, moving to go by him.

"It should have been us," he spat.

"What?" she said, looking at him in confusion.

"The family, the baby, the happy life," he hissed. "It should have been us. It could have been us, if you hadn't been so wrapped up in yourself. I'd have been happy with you, but I wasn't enough. You did this to me! We could have been happy if for one minute you'd thought of anyone other than yourself."

"_Don't do this_!" she said tightly, though quietly. The last thing she wanted was to draw attention to them. Before she knew what was happening, he had her arm in a vice-like grip. She grimaced in pain but as soon she felt the grip, it was gone. There was an odd sound, like a yip, and then Ron was four feet away from her, holding his own wrist and staring over her shoulder.

Another hand, this one as familiar to her as her own, appeared on her shoulder. Remus stood at her side, his eyes focused on Ron with barely suppressed anger. Holding her close to his side, Remus spoke.

"You will never touch her again," he murmured.

"I-"Ron began but Remus cut him off.

"You will _never_ touch her again," he repeated, his voice so low that it almost growled. "Hermione is my wife now. You lost your chance years ago. Now go away and leave us alone."

"Remus, mate," Ron tried, reaching out towards him, red-rimmed blue eyes pleading. Hermione glanced at her husband, and saw that his face was hard.

"No," he said flatly. "No, Ron. You don't get to blame anyone else for the mess you've made of your life, and you don't get to manhandle my wife. If I see your hands on her ever again, even as fond as I am of your family," he continued, his voice throbbing with anger, "I will hurt you. Now, you need to go."

Ron stared, wide-eyed for another moment before he turned and fled. Hermione watched him until Remus turned her face to his.

"Are you alright?" he asked, his other arm coming around her.

"Yes," she said, wrapping her own arms around his back. "Thank you."

Just being held in his arms was more of a comfort to her than anything else in the world. He kissed her forehead and she let herself melt into his chest.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, rubbing the small of her back.

"Wonderful," she replied. "I've really never felt better in my life."

"I'm going to enjoy that for as long as I can because I believe Ginny felt the same until the morning she ran to the bathroom and had her head in the toilet for the next four months."

She chuckled and tightened her grip. "I love you, Mr. Lupin."

He sighed and tipped her head back with a finger beneath her chin, looking into her eyes with pure adoration. And right there, in the middle of someone else's yard with people all around them, he kissed her warmly. His lips caressed hers with practiced agility and she sighed, holding him even closer. It would have been quite easy to forget where they were, but Fred or George would never let that happen.

"Oi!" one of them called. "There really are children present this time!"

Remus laughed into her mouth before pulling away and sending a rude hand gesture to George, who gasped in mock outrage. He then looked back at her and grinned.

"I love you too, Mrs. Lupin."

Fin.


End file.
